Posts filed under ‘polyamory




Poly-gone

Monday sexual health seminars have been interesting to say the least, but not really enjoyable on my part:

Another medic [in the context of finding out if patients are having sex in parts of the world where HIV is highly prevalent]: “So are we meant to ask if couples go on Safari and swing with the African tour guides? Har har!” God, you’re so funny and profoundly insightful, let me go and rip my sides off, they’re splitting already.

Towards the end of the session, the tutors had a list of ‘alternative lifestyles’ listed up on the board as an example of how we as doctors should be aware of and non-judgemental about. I was surprised to see Polygamy on the list, which the registrar addressed: “And some people choose to have more than one relationship, sexual or otherwise at a time.” I wanted to ask whether they meant polyamory rather than polygamy, as the latter is more familiar and controversial among people and tends to be associated with marriage than relationships as a whole.

Instead, I kept schtum. Mainly apathy and tiredness. And partly because I don’t want certain assumptions made about me by the likes of Safari Boy. Then again it might make classes more interesting if he did.

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2 comments February 19, 2009

“Freedom is deciding whose slave you want to be”

I am still having issues with the fact that I qualify as a doctor next year. For so long the prospect of qualification was a blip on the horizon and life as a student drowned away any potential musings on the subject. Except now, it’s real and I’m constantly thinking about deaneries, paying off debt and if it’s what I really want to do.

I have danced with the idea of going to law school, essentially a year of rote learning – could I even deal with that after medical finals? I have thought about doing courses in journalism, or teaching scuba diving somewhere in the pretty pacific. All these ideas have given me some degree of comfort about the uncertainty of what I want to do. Except something happened. Obs/gynae happened, and as I predicted; I am absolutely loving it. This is despite the looks of horror I am getting from staff members as if I’m suggesting I like to self-flagellate before breakfast each morning. If I had hated obs & gynae, it would have secured my decision to eventually leave medicine, but on the contrary, it has made me think – horror of horrors – that I would enjoy being a doctor, and a hospital doctor at that.

I had assumed that once I got to the stage of qualifying, I would feel less constricted by my career choice, but as it seems now, the handcuffs are getting tighter. B often tells me to close my eyes and think of what I’d enjoy doing the most, but my subconscious distracts me with food and fond memories of previous sexual encounters.

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To curb my anxieties, I have been collecting discounted cookbooks from a bookshop in Lambeth North. As the flatmate says, “You can never have too many cookbooks.” I am determined to eat more seasonal fruit and veg and I am trying to make the most of the autumn/winter harvest. The tiny greengrocers on the high road is in abundance of Jerusalem artichokes, blood oranges and salsify. I made a rather delicious soup with some Jerusalem artichokes and white truffle oil, which I sat down and consumed while watching some dismal cooking on Masterchef ensue.

Hat tip to a certain cheese sandwich; B got me the Decadent Cookbook for our anniversary. As well as recipes there are some very interesting stories and information on cooking techniques e.g. how to prepare a dog for slaughter – not sure how the RSPCA would feel about that one. (For the interested, a dog should be tied up for 24 hours, and beaten with small sticks to get the adipose tissue moving.)

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Another hat-tip, but I am immensely enjoying “Family,” a web series sit-com about a MFM triad based in Seattle. The clips are short and I’m finding them highly entertaining.

1 comment January 28, 2009

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