April 9, 2008 rooroo

Contrary to my blog name, I rarely use the word ‘domme’ when using it to describe something or someone who is a dom, or dominant. The reason for this is that it’s a gendered word, alterting the invididual that the aforementioned person is a woman, just so they don’t fall off a chair or something. In some circles it’s talked about with the same level of rage that I apply to ‘toning/toned/tone,’ a way of fluffying up something for the sake of not being too controversial or offensive.

So why did I use it? Well, I thought about something like pinkdumbbell, but I thought that too closely resembled the pink dumbbells forum. Then I thought about my darker side and thought aha, you clever person you, lets go along the lines of dom dominant dommebell, and dommebell was born. Much as I like the crispness of the other words, they weren’t going to have the same way of flowing as something that seems to fit so well with dumbbell. Maybe it was a subliminal way of spilling my oestrogen over the sweaty, grunting 40kg dumbbell that no one picks up at the gym. And fuck it, it’s my blog, I like the way it looks and sounds.

In all honesty though, the blog name has little bearing on how I approach BDSM. I am submissive. It has taken me a while to grow comfortable with this, and in a sense I’m still growing into it but in this part of my life, I don’t lean towards being dominant. I do have little ’bouts’ of where I sit comfortably with being dominant (as a percentage, probably about 10% of the time), but it doesn’t happen very often. My boyfriend understands and is pretty flexible so it works well for us.


Entry Filed under: BDSM, kink

2 Comments Add your own

  • 1. elle&hellip  | 

    I was thinking about gender-specific nouns last week. In English we get our knickers in a twist about them, but in French or German it’s presumably quite a different issue, as every noun has an arbitrary but gender-specific article. I wonder if this fact changes the nuances of feminist discussion in different languages.

  • 2. dommebell&hellip  | 

    I’d never thought about that before, I’d be interested to know if it does.

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